1. HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting
tools built on the Ouija board principle: It transforms human
energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to
influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.
2. VICE GRIP PLIERS: Used to round off bolt
heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to
transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.
3. OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely
for setting various flammable objects in your shed on fire. Also
handy for igniting the grease inside a wheel hub you're trying to get
the bearing race out of.
4. HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering
a vehicle to the ground after you have installed your new disk brake
pads, trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper bar.
5. 2 x 4: Used to attempt to lever a
vehicle off a hydraulic jack handle.