Posted: 7/4/2018, 4:24 a.m. EDT
I was thinking about declaring my independence, but I think I need
someone to take care of me. I mean, like, I really don't trust
myself. I need strict supervision, especially when it comes to July 4th fireworks. Lighting fireworks is very difficult if you
don't have any thumbs, like the Skipster. It's not like I blew
them off in an ugly M-80 or cherry bomb incident or anything like that.
It's just that us dawgs don't come equipped that way. We do,
however, have very sensitive ears, so fireworks can be a problem.
I've found that the best way to deal with fireworks is to buy a nice
pair of Bose brand sound-cancelling headphones. I'm sorry, what